Relationships – Help on How to Decide if She’s (He’s) a Keeper

Songs about relationships
urban

“She was a perfect prayer in a desperate hour.”

– Stupid Boy by Keith Urban,

 

chino-nacho
Chino Y Nacho

Aqui hay Amor  ( Here There is Love)
– by Chino y Nacho

Tú tienes la magia, la sabiduría,
Tienes la práctica y la teoría…
Yo quiero ponerme viejo, pero a tu lado.

Translation:
You have the magic, the wisdom,
You have the experience and the theory…
I want to grow old, but at your side.

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If you had an emotion that felt shipwrecked, I’d be a sail ship coming to your island of desire.

– Cuando Me Enamoro – Julio Iglesias

 

antaeus2Antaeus, son of Gaia, the Earth goddess , grew stronger each time he touched the earth –

That’s how I feel every time I’m with you, each time I touch you, each time I hold you. God, how I love it.

“I hope you never leave… Your music is so hard to find.”     – from My Heart is a Stereo by Gym Class Heroes

Rules To Help Decide if She (or He) is a “Keeper” –

  1. Is she happy to see you? Do you see happiness in her eyes when she’s with you?
  2. Does she fight fair? Do she stay on the issue that bothers her and does she say what she wants, or does she resort to personal attacks and use the terms “you never…”  or “you always…” ?
  3. Is she easy to be with? Do you feel relaxed or relieved when you are with her, or does it require effort on your part? Do you laugh with each other? Does your spirit feel more buoyant when you’re with her, or does your spirit feel drained  or even just a little deflated after being with her?
  4. Does she inspire you to pursue things that bring you joy or raise forgotten dreams, or does she “kill your [nascent] vibes”?
  5. Is she a good listener? And, if you come up with an idea, does she build on it and make it even better?
  6. Does she enjoy some of the things you really like to do –  concerts, roller coasters, art exhibits, dancing, travel and exploring, kayaking, camping, walking, architecture, sailboating, (fill in the blanks)?

If she or he does a number of these things, especially the first three,  you just may have yourself a “keeper”

Never Assume. Never expect others to read your mind.

“In any kind of relationship we can make the assumption that others know what we think, and we don’t have to say what we want. They are going to do what we want because they know us so well. If they don’t do what we want, what we assume they should do, we feel hurt and think, “How could you do that? You should know.” Again, we make the assumption that the other person knows what we want. A whole drama is created because we make this assumption and then put more assumptions on top of it.”       –   Miguel Ruiz

As a young child, I thought that it should be obvious how I felt and that others should act accordingly. I found that people often were not observant, or were preoccupied or distracted.

Words are a poor way of communicating. I often can interpret a simple sentence in three different ways, so I ask for clarification (this drives my girlfriend crazy who thinks what she’s saying is obvious). But words are far more helpful than making unilateral assumptions as Ruiz says.  There have been many more problems in this world from under-communicating than from over-communicating.

 

 

 

 

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